1) If you want to look like your hair is graying, put flour in it.
2) If you want some punk rock hair, costume stores STILL carry that smelly aerosol fluorescent shit you spray on you hair.
3) Use a crimping iron for a totally 80's freaky look.
..What am I talking about here? Let's be realistic. With all the skanky ass costumes out there, nobody's going to be looking at your hair. Unless it's growing out of your tits.
Halloween is no longer that holiday where you rummage through your garage/basement/attic and create something fabulously freaky. It's no longer the season where mothers sit at sewing machines fabricating their kid's dream costume. It's the season where you go out and buy yourself some thigh-highs, stripper heels, and RuPaul eyelashes. My 3 year old daughter picked out a military mini-dress in her size that read "MAJOR FLIRT" on the nametag. That's right, kids. Flirt your little heart out with my 3 year old. Git loose.
So instead of me sitting here and wasting the internet time that I am stealing(friendly borrowing) from the business next door and telling you how to blah blah blah, here is a better tutorial from you favorite crazy barber:
Decide how much you want to be ogled this Halloween. If you want every guy to stare at you, let the goods hang out all night in one of today's hottest costumes. Stuff your bra. If you want no one to look at you, cut a couple holes in a sheet for eyes and throw it over your head, like the good old days. And don't stress about which of the gazillion hoochie costumes to pick. Find one that fits or is too small, and fucking rock that shit. You're a brick. house. mighty mighty, just lettin it all hang out.
Personally, I was going to dress up as a skankimal. But I will probably just go as this:
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